Revelations
by theoofoof
Summary: Post 5.3. Harry and Ruth are finding their way back to each other after her refusal of her second date, but will a revelation from Ruth's past damage them beyond repair? H/R
1. Chapter 1

**Title: **Revelations  
**Fandom: **Spooks  
**Rating: **T  
**Genre:** Romance/Family**  
Warnings:** None

**Summary:** Post 5.3. Harry and Ruth are finding their way back to each other but will a revelation from Ruth's past damage them beyond repair?

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Spooks or any of the characters you may recognise. They all belong to Kudos/BBC.

**A/N: **Okay so this idea came to me today and wouldn't go away until I got it down on paper, so here it is. I'm full of a cold so this could be the product of the cough medicine I am currently taking; I'm really not sure how this will go down so that's my excuse if everyone hates it/thinks it's completely unrealistic.

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**Chapter 1**

_Friday 19th January 2007_

"Pass me those plates will you Harry?" Ruth asks from her position near the sink. They've just had a delicious meal courtesy of Ruth and are now facing the dreaded clean-up. Harry passes her the requested items and she begins to wash them. "I'm glad you agreed to come tonight," she tells him with a shy smile.

"I'm glad you invited me."

"I thought we needed to talk…about why I pulled away. I needed to explain. I wasn't entirely honest before."

"It wasn't just because of the gossip then?" he asks, picking up a towel and beginning to dry the dishes as she places them on the drainer.

"No, although that did bother me, but I'm sure I'd have got over it. It's because we barely know each other; out pasts are littered with things that could break our relationship and I didn't want to get too close to you without exploring those."

"Are you sure you want to know?" Harry asks, assuming she's referring to his past indiscretions.

"Harry, I didn't necessarily mean y-"

The sound of the doorbell cuts her off. Ruth looks down at her hands submerged in the washing up bowl, then at Harry. "Could you get that?" she asks with a sigh. She'd been so close to telling him; the closest she'd ever been to telling anyone apart from her immediate family.

"Of course," is his reply, tossing the towel onto the counter and making is way down the hall. He returns a few moments later with a policeman in tow. At the sight of him Ruth quickly dries her hands.

"Ruth Evershed?" asks the officer.

"Yes. What's this about?"

"I'm PC Quinn. Is there somewhere we could talk?" Ruth leads them through to the living room and gestures at him to take a seat. "Maybe you should sit down too," the officer suggests as he sits on the sofa.

"I'm fine with standing thanks."

Harry notices the look on the officers face; it's one he's worn himself on several occasions when having to deliver an agony message. "I think sitting down would be a good idea," he suggests. Ruth humours him sitting at the other end of the sofa and Harry takes a seat in the arm chair next to it. He reaches out to hold Ruth's hand; a show of support.

Once they're both settled, the officer begins. "Do you know a Mark Johnson and a Kevin Soames?"

Ruth nods. "We were at university together," she explains, trying to ignore the feeling of horror deep in the pit of her stomach.

"I'm very sorry to have to tell you this Miss Evershed, but they were both killed in a road accident earlier this evening."

Ruth's composure breaks and she lets out a gut-wrenching cry, wrenching her hand from Harry's and placing it over her mouth; sobbing for her friends. Harry moves from his seat on the arm chair and perches on the arm of the sofa, reaching out and rubbing comforting circles on her back soothingly. He wonders why this officer was here; did neither of the victims have next of kin? Why was he putting Ruth through this?

Ruth's eyes go wide suddenly. "Grace? Was Grace with them?!"

PC Quinn smiles sadly. "No; she was with her Grandparents."

"Oh thank God! Wh-what happened?" Ruth enquires, holding back her sobs..

"The roads weren't great to start with, as I'm sure you can imagine given the recent snowfall. They collided with another car which forced them off the road. The driver of the other car had been drinking. I was the first officer on the scene and at that point Mark was still alive. I travelled with him in the ambulance and all he could talk about was Grace… and you. He said that if he and Kevin didn't make it; I was to bring Grace to you. That you'd talked about it?"

"Not long after she was born, yes. Is she still at her Grandparents?"

"No, she's outside in the car with my colleague. We felt it would be best if you heard the news without her here."

"Does she…? Has she been told about what's happened?"

"Yes. She was understandably upset and very eager to see you."

"Well, I'll clean myself up and you can bring her in," Ruth tells him, wiping the tears from her face. He rises to leave and Ruth returns to the kitchen, turning on the tap and splashing cold water on her face. Harry follows. He feels he's missing something in this whole situation; that everyone else is privy to a key piece of information that he is not. It's not a feeling he is comfortable with.

"Ruth?" he questions.

Ruth leans forward; holding on to the counter so tightly that her knuckles are white and sighs. "Harry…I need to ask you to do something for me? Something that I know won't be easy for you. I need you not to ask me any questions just yet. I promise I will find a time to answer anything you want to know, but I can't right now Harry. I'm sorry."

"Do you want me to leave?"

Ruth shakes her head. "Not particularly, but you may not want to stay when you realise what's going on."

Harry's reply is cut off by the creaking hinges of the front door. The police officer has returned and at his side stands a young girl looking scared and helpless, clutching a brown teddy bear. Ruth steps out into the hallway and the child runs to her.

"Mummy!"

Ruth crouches down and picks up the child... her daughter, holding her tightly. She carries her into the living room, sits with her on the sofa and begins stroking her hair, all the while conscious of Harry's shocked gaze.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N:** Thanks for all the lovely reviews and special mentions for threesummerdays, TheChicaChic and Sparky75 for working out the 'mystery' of Grace. I'll admit know that I have no clue where this is going past about chapter 5 so could be interesting!

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**Chapter 2**

_Still Friday 19th January 2007…_

Harry stands in the doorway of the living room, watching Ruth comfort the young child…her child? He racks his brain; there is nothing in her personnel file about this, not even the slightest inkling. How could she possibly have a child that he didn't know about? Questions whirl around his head; he doesn't know where to begin.

A small cough alerts him to the fact that the police officer is still standing in the hallway. He's holding out a pink bag. "This is Grace's," he explains. "It was what she had with her when we picked her up." Harry nods numbly. The officer drops the bag by the stairs and hands Harry a small card. "This is the number of the Family Liaison Officer assigned to the case. If Miss Evershed needs anything…" Harry takes the card from him, but doesn't reply. "Right," continues the officer, "I'll be off then." Harry turns away from the officer as he leaves; re-focusing his attention on Ruth and Grace. Ruth is talking, cooing over her daughter; her voice is softer than he's ever known it.

"Did the nice policeman explain what happened?" she asks gently.

"It was a lady," Grace explains. "She brought me biscuits and juice."

"What did she tell you?"

"She said that Daddy and Papa had had to go away and that they were in heaven."

"That's right."

"We can't visit them in heaven, can we?"

Harry can see the tears pooling in the corners of Ruth's eyes as the conversation continues. "No sweetheart we can't. I'm sorry."

"Why did they go away?" Grace whimpers.

"They didn't want to," Ruth assures her.

"Then why?"

"They didn't have a choice sweetheart."

"They were taken away?"

"Sort of." Ruth sighs as she wonders how to explain what has happened to her daughter.

"The lady said was an accident."

"It was, but someone else was being silly and caused the accident."

"I don't understand,"

"Remember on your birthday, you were so excited that you were running around the house and you ran right into the table and cut your head?" Grace nods, rubbing a slight scar on her hairline. "Well that was an accident wasn't it? But if you hadn't been running then…"

"…it wouldn't have happened."

"Exactly. Well this is a little bit like that. If the other person hadn't been being silly, the accident wouldn't have happened and your Dads wouldn't have had to leave you."

"Oh." Grace is quiet for a few moments before asking, "What will happen to me now?"

"Do you remember what Daddy, Papa and I told you about why I never lived with you?"

Grace nods. "Daddy and Papa really wanted a baby but they couldn't have one because boys can't have babies. So you said you would have me for them."

"That's right I did and I love you so much. When you were born, for a moment I didn't want to give you away to your Daddy and Papa; I wanted to keep you all to myself. But I'd promised them they could have you and I knew how happy and excited they were that you were going to go and live with them so I HAD to give you to them."

"Because when you make a promise, you have to keep it," Grace states.

"Exactly," smiles Ruth sadly.

"But they wanted you to have a Mummy too; they knew how important Mummies are to little girls, so I still saw you lots and lots. And the three of us agreed that if anything ever happened to them that you would come and live with me."

"So am I going to live with you now?" she asks.

"If you want to?" Ruth asks, and Harry

"Yeh," Grace replies sleepily, snuggling into Ruth's side. Ruth places a kiss on her forehead and in moments her daughter is asleep. She rises slowly, careful not to wake the sleeping bundle in her arms and is startled to find Harry stood in the doorway.

"You're still here?" she whispers. She's astonished that he's stayed. "I'll just go and put her down and then I'll explain…or at least I'll try to anyway."

"The police left a bag of her things," Harry informs her, gesturing to where her bag is lying on the floor at the foot of the stairs. Ruth bends down to get it but can't quite reach it with Grace in her arms.

Hating to watch Ruth struggle and not wanting Grace to wake, Harry picks up the bag and hands it to Ruth, their fingers brushing as he does so. The electricity between them is still there, but they are both painfully aware that now is not the time to explore that so, reluctantly, they pull away.

"I'll make us a drink shall I?" Harry suggests. "Tea?"

"Please," Ruth answers before continuing up the stairs to put Grace to sleep. Harry runs his hand through his hair as he flicks on the kettle; this was not how he had been hoping the night would end. As the kettle boils he runs through the last twenty minutes in his head, over and over again. How could she not tell him?! The more he thinks, the angrier he gets and he knows he can't talk to her now; he needs to leave and he needs a stiff drink. He heads back through the hallway and grabs his coat off the bannister. He falters a little as he approaches the door, knowing Ruth is expecting him to stay, but then he hears Grace stir and Ruth begins to soothe her back to sleep. The enormity of the situation and of the secrets hit him once more. The door closes behind him with a slam.

Upstairs the noise of the door startles Grace to full wakefulness and Ruth sighs and fights back her tears and she convinces her to go back to sleep. Harry's gone and Ruth knows she's no-one to blame but herself. When Grace finally drifts off again she lets her silent tears fall.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

_Saturday 20th January 2007…_

Harry doesn't return that night and when Ruth wakes early the next morning there are no messages from him. While she knows his reaction was partly her fault, a feeling of resentment is starting to fester inside of her. She'd told him she would explain and he's seemingly agreed to listen but then he'd just bolted. Surely after everything they'd been through together she'd deserved more than that?

She potters around, finishing the washing up that had been left the previous evening. Grace wakes around 8 o'clock and the two of them eat breakfast together before settling down in front of Saturday morning television, Fidget joining them and snuggling on Grace's lap. They're not that long into TMI when the phone rings. Ruth rushes into the hallway to answer it in case it's Harry.

"Hello?"

"Hello Ruth, it's Sheila." Ruth braces herself against the wall as she hears Mark's mother's voice. They'd always had a good relationship and she'd been very supportive of the decisions the three of them had made; a stark contrast to the reaction of her own mother. She just doesn't know what to say to her. What do you say to someone who has lost their child?

"Hello Sheila. How are you?" she asks.

"Numb," the older woman admits. "You?"

"To be honest, I don't think it's really sunk in yet. I wanted to ring; I just didn't know if you'd be up to it."

"It's okay, I'm sure you've had your hands full anyway; the police told us they were picking up Grace from Kevin's parents and bringing her to you. How is she?"

"She's okay. She was upset last night, but I don't think she really understands what it all means."

"No, possibly not. At least she's still got you."

"I'm not entirely sure that's a good thing," she whispers; her confidence wavering.

"Whatever do you mean?"

"Oh don't get me wrong, I wouldn't have her with anyone else but how much do I really know about her? Her routine etc. I know I've been involved in her life, but sometimes it's the little things that matter the most; I mean, I've never even boiled her an egg; I don't know if she likes them runny or hard." Her analytical mind knows that she's being ridiculous but it's been an emotional twelve hours and she can't seem to reign herself in.

"Oh Ruth. Those things don't matter one iota," Sheila assures. "You love her don't you?"

"Of course!"

"Then everything else can be learnt. Listen, five and a half years ago, you did one of the most selfless things anybody can do. And that's how I know you're going to be fine because being a mother is about putting someone else's wants and needs above your own and you've proven you can do that better than most."

Ruth feels the tears well up again. "Thank you Sheila. That… that means a lot. And I'm sorry; dumping all of that on you; you've got enough to deal with."

"Nonsense; you're family and it stops me from thinking about Mark and getting upset."

The doorbell rings as Ruth is about to reply. Kindly asking Sheila to hang on, she opens it to find Harry stood there, a bouquet of flowers in his hand and an apologetic look on his face. She raises her eyebrow at him as if to say that flowers aren't going to solve anything, but she doesn't speak. The silence drags on so much so that Sheila has to ask Ruth if she's still there.

Blushing at the fact that she's forgotten about Mark's mother being on the phone she quickly apologises and walks off into the kitchen chatting away. She leaves the door open and Harry takes this as an invitation to enter. Not wanting to intrude on her obviously private phone call he decides to wait in the living room. He hears Grace before he sees her, laughing at something on the television. She doesn't see him at first, allowing him his first opportunity to really look at her. She looks about 5 years old and has long brown hair tied back in a low ponytail. She's wearing pink pyjamas and is contentedly stroking Fidget. Beside her sits the brown teddy bear she had last night. Sitting on the sofa in front of the television she could be anybody's little girl, but when she finally turns to face him all he can see is Ruth. Grace has the same eyes and smile. She's a miniature version of her.

"Hello," she greets shyly.

Harry knows that if he's got any hope of gaining Ruth's forgiveness then he needs to make an effort and besides, it's not fair to hold anything against Grace; she's just a child. "Hello. I'm Harry. You're Grace right?"

She nods before eyeing the flowers. "Are those for Mummy?" she asks. Harry nods. "They're pretty."

"Do you think she'll like them?"

Grace considers the bouquet seriously for a few moments before coming to a conclusion. "Yes," she decides, eliciting a small smile from Harry.

Ruth re-appears before they can chat anymore. "Sorry about that," she tells Harry but her tone is slightly clipped; she's not happy with him and he knows she has a right to be angry. Ruth turns Grace, "Sweetheart, I need to talk to Harry about some grown up things; will you be okay in here for a bit if we go to the kitchen?"

"Yeh," is Grace's only response, her attention having been taken back by the television. Ruth leads Harry through to the kitchen leaving both doors ajar slightly in case Grace needs her.

"These are for you," Harry says handing her the bouquet. "I'm assuming that your brilliant brain will understand their meaning."

"Striped carnations mean regret," she muses as she finds a vase and begins to prepare the flowers.

"Yes. Because I do regret my actions last night, very much. Running away was extremely cowardly and I don't blame you for being angry with me."

"I'm not so much angry as…disappointed." Harry winces; somehow that's worse; anger he could deal with. "I at least thought you'd have stayed to hear me out, especially as you offered to make us both a drink; I thought we were going to talk. I thought we were going to be okay."

"I'm sorry. I intended to stay, honestly I did. But as I waited for you to come back down, I kept replaying events over and over in my head. I couldn't understand how you could keep such a secret from me?"

"Oh because I know all of your secrets!" she retorts sarcastically.

"I never said you did!" He takes a deep breath; he's come here to sort things out; he doesn't want to fight. "Look, I got angry. I needed a stiff drink. So I went to the pub down the road. I was going to come back but one whiskey turned into several and well, let's just say I don't really remember getting home and I'm suffering for it this morning."

"Good!" A pause. "Sorry. I don't mean that. Deep down I know I was in the wrong too. I should have told you about Grace years ago; it should never have been a secret; not from you."

"Speaking of Grace, how's she doing?"

"She had a rough night but she seems okay this morning."

"She's beautiful," Harry tells her. "Are you still willing to tell me about her?"

"That depends; are you willing to listen?

"Ye-"

Ruth cuts him off. "To the whole thing Harry, and not run away if you hear something you don't like?"

"I'll listen; I promise."

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**A/N:** Ruth will give her side of story in the next chapter, I promise.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: **Thanks so much for the encouraging reviews. Now for Ruth's story. I hope this makes sense; my head is still foggy from this flu thing so I'm sorry if there are mistakes.

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**Chapter 4**

_Still Saturday 20th January 2007…_

When Ruth's put all the flowers in the vase, they sit at the table, her opposite him. Neither speaks for a while, not sure where to start, but Ruth knows it's up to her so eventually she bites the bullet.

"I met Mark at university; we were on the same course. He approached me in our first lecture and asked if the seat next to me was taken. Then he made some daft joke about the Classics and we just clicked; it was one of those instant friendships. He was gay and very open about his sexuality, but it didn't stop me wishing he wasn't; he was kind, sweet, funny and quite good looking too. I was a little bit in love with him for a few weeks but that soon faded and he became my best friend. We lived together in the second year and that was when he met Kevin. He lived a couple of houses down; next door but three I think. Anyway Mark and Kevin fell madly in love and were inseparable. They were such a lovely couple. They lived together after graduation and seemed so happy. But there was always something bubbling below the surface; something missing. They were desperate to have a family and it was tearing them both apart that they couldn't. They both tried to adopt separately in the late nineties but their applications failed and they were devastated. So…"

"You offered to have a child for them?" Harry guesses. He's worked that much out for himself from what he'd heard of Ruth and Grace's conversation last night.

Ruth nods. "They both thought I was nuts at first, but this was something I just knew I wanted to do for them. It's really hard to explain; here were two people with all the love in the world to give to a child and they were being stopped from doing that and well, I could fix it. Finally, after a lot of heated discussions, they saw that what I was saying made sense. So we went ahead and did it. Grace was born on the 21st April 2001 at 7.17pm and weighed 7lb 2ozs."

"I had it all worked out; my analytical brain had balanced the pros and cons and decided that it would all be fine and it was…well, almost all of it. I stumbled a little when Mark and Kevin came to take Grace. It was so hard giving her up; I nearly changed my mind. But as I thought about it I remembered how disappointed they had been when the adoption applications had failed, and as much as I wanted to keep her, the rational part of me knew I wasn't ready to be a full time mum; I wanted to fulfil my ambition of joining the Service. Mark and Kevin had already assured me that I'd still be a part of Grace's life and she'd always know me as her Mum, so I decided it was best for all of us to go through with the original plan."

"As soon as I handed her to Mark and saw the looks on his and Kevin's faces I knew that, as hard as it was, I'd done the right thing. They were elated. I was honoured to have been able to bring that much joy and happiness into their lives and it brought us all even closer together. I won't lie, it was tough but I saw Grace regularly and although it was hard at first for all of us, we soon adjusted to our "family" arrangement. Mark and Kevin were true to their word; I was as full a part of Grace's life as I wanted to be. They never tried to push me out and even involved me in decisions that would affect her like which school she would go to."

She stops there, giving Harry time to digest. He opens his mouth to ask a question but changes his mind and swiftly closes it again. "What?" Ruth presses, observing him curiously.

"It's nothing," Harry insists.

"No, go on," she presses. "I said I'd explain and that means answering any questions you have."

"I just wondered…and I know I shouldn't because it's really none of my business but….who was Grace's father? Her biological father I mean. Was it Mark or Kevin?"

"It was Mark. He and Kevin spoke about it at length and decided that as Mark and I had known each other longer it seemed right that we should be ones to have the child."

"So you had IVF?"

Ruth blushes and looks down. "No. We looked into it but it was so expensive and there was no guarantee that it would take the first time…" Ruth trails off, she's sure Harry will work out where she's going.

"You slept with him?" he blurts out rather loudly, and Ruth shushes him instantly, very much aware of Grace in the next room. "Hells bells Ruth!"

"Yes, Mark and I slept together. Like I said, they couldn't afford artificial insemination especially when we may have needed more than one shot so we all agreed that we would try it the natural way." Harry tries to block out the images that assault his brain and Ruth can tell he's struggling with it. "I'm sorry if this is difficult to hear Harry but you have to know it meant nothing in that way; it was clinical."

"How could it not mean anything? You said you loved him!"

"I loved him as my best friend Harry. Anything else had faded years before. It wasn't like being married; like you and Jane. There was no passion; no electricity, just a lot of fumbling and embarrassment helped along by a hideous amount of alcohol…on both sides! It was just something we had to do."

"Not that different to me and Jane then after all," Harry murmurs, but changes the subject before Ruth can latch onto his comment. "Was it just the once?"

"Yes; once was all it took; we timed it by my… cycle so we had the best chance."

"I'm beginning to see what you meant last night; about there being things that could damage a relationship? If we had…gone further with our personal relationship before I knew about this..."

"I know; I'd been trying to find the right time to tell you; I knew you didn't already know because it wasn't in my file and if you'd found out by any other means you would have pulled me up on that."

"Why is it not in your file?" Harry enquires, straying into 'boss' territory.

"Because I didn't want it to be; I wanted to keep her out of danger and…I wasn't sure people would understand – I had some bad reactions from people at the time. "

"But, how did y...? I mean, surely it came up in your background checks? And why did no-one at GCHQ ever mention it?"

"What was it you once asked me; was any institution safe from me?" She raises an eyebrow at him. "I'm good at what I do and I was even back when I was at GCHQ." she tells him with a small smile, confirming his suspicions that she hacked the system and removed all traces of Grace. "I kept it from the majority of people at GCHQ – I was lucky; I didn't put on much weight so I was able to conceal it with baggy clothes and the like. Then I took a leave of absence at about 6 and a half months. Only my boss knew the real reason. Anyway, we've digressed. When you dropped me off after our dinner, Grace had phoned and left a message on my answering machine. It just hit me that I couldn't go on keeping this from you if our relationship was to move forward. So I used the gossip as an excuse to put some distance between us while I gathered my thoughts and worked out how to tell you… I never expected you to find out like you did though," she whimpers, a tear rolling down her cheek.

For the first time since Grace's arrival and the revelations that came with it, Harry remembers that Ruth has lost two close friends; she's grieving for them as well as having to deal with everything else. He reaches out across the table and lays his hand on hers. "Are you okay?"

"I just can't believe they're gone!" she sobs. Watching her cry, Harry's heart breaks and it's then that he realises that, as much as he is hurt by the thought of Ruth keeping something so big from him, he still cares about her. The past twelve hours have done nothing to weaken his love for her. So he pushes his chair back and makes his way round to her side of the table. Once there, he bends down to her, gathers her in his arms and holds her as she cries; for her friends, the memories they will never share together and for Grace, whose life has been irrevocably changed forever.


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N:** Thanks for all the reviews guys - keep 'em coming please!

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**Chapter 5**

_Still Saturday 20th January 2007…_

Grace pads into the kitchen to find her mum sobbing into Harry's arms and the sight distresses her. "Mummy?!" She rushes over and Harry steps back allowing Grace to get through to Ruth. She wriggles her way onto her Mum's knee and gives her a big hug, but this just makes Ruth think of Grace having to grow up without Mark and Kevin so makes her cry more. Grace turns to Harry, "Why is she crying?"

"She's sad about your Dad and…" he wracks his brain trying to remember what Ruth had called Kevin when she was talking to Grace last night… "Papa?"

Grace nods solemnly, tightening her hold on her Mum. "It's okay Mummy," she tells her. "Please don't cry!"

Ruth wipes her tears away then gives a small sniffle as she cuddles her daughter. "I'm sorry sweetheart; I just miss them."

"Me too!" Grace admits. "Promise me we'll never forget them Mummy?"

"We'll always remember Grace. I promise." The two of them sit quietly; and Harry steps away, allowing them this time together; to grieve for their mutual loss. He busies himself in the kitchen; making them both a drink and washing up their breakfast dishes. He's still stood at the sink when he feels a small pat on his hip. He looks down and Grace is holding out her empty cup. He takes it from her and refills it.

"What do you say Grace?" Ruth prompts.

"Thank you," Grace responds almost automatically.

"You're very welcome," Harry tells her.

Ruth looks up at him, a little uneasily. "I need to go and…freshen up; could you keep an eye on her for a couple of minutes?"

"Of course. Go."

* * *

Once Ruth has washed her face and composed herself, she dresses Grace and gets her ready for the day. There are only a couple of changes of clothes in the bag Grace has, meaning Ruth will have to visit Mark and Kevin's house to retrieve more of her belongings; it's not something she's looking forward to.

"What do you want to do today?" Ruth asks Grace as she brushes her hair.

"Can we build a snowman?"

"A snowman? Won't you get too cold?"

"No," she insists. Ruth considers her request, looking out of the window at the weather. "Please Mummy!" Grace pleads, worried that she'll say no.

"Why is it so important for you to build a snowman?" Ruth queries, sensing there's more to this than meets the eye.

Grace looks down sadly. "Daddy and Papa promised we could build a snowman when they got back today."

Ruth closes her eyes to stem the tears. "Well then, if you want to build a snowman, a snowman we shall build!"

"Really?"

"Yes."

"Will Harry help?"

Ruth is slightly taken aback by Grace's question. "I don't know, he's a busy man; he's probably got more important things to do."

Harry, who is passing the door, sticks his head in. "Did someone say something about a snowman?"

"Mummy and I are going to build one. Will you help?"

Harry is also taken aback by her request; they haven't really had much time to acquaint themselves with one another. "I will if you want me to"

"Please!"

"But Harry, you hate the snow," Ruth reminds. Grace looks shocked, not able to understand how anybody can hate snow.

"No, I hate the way the transport system grinds to a halt when it snows but, as I don't have anywhere particular to be today, that's not an issue. Snow itself I don't mind; and I'll have you know Miss Evershed, that I used to be quite good at making snowmen."

Grace is so excited at the prospect of making a snowman she's practically bouncing up and down on the sofa.

"Harry, can I have a word?" Ruth asks, he leads him out in the hallway. "You don't have to do this," she tells him, wanting to absolve him of any guilt he feels for his behaviour last night.

"It's fine; I'd like to…unless you don't want me to. Sorry; I'm being presumptuous. Of course you'd want to spend some time with her on your own."

"It's not that. I just don't want you to feel like you_ have_ to…"

Harry takes Ruth's hand. "Ruth I-" The phone rings and he drops her hand almost guiltily.

Ruth answers the phone and immediately lets out a weary sigh. "Hi Mum."

"I've just seen the news; that accident on the A31…they said the driver was a Mark Johnson and he was in the car with someone called Kevin . Is it...?"

"Yeh, it was them," Ruth confirms sadly.

"Oh my!" Her mother pauses before uttering her next words. "I suppose that means you'll have to finally take responsibility for little Grace."

Ruth rolls her eyes; no matter how many times she has tried to explain the reasoning behind her decision to have Grace for Mark and Kevin, her mother will not accept it. She had got it into her head that Ruth and Mark had slept together for the sake of it; and when she'd found out she was pregnant she'd shunned the responsibility by dumping the child with Mark. Ruth could never be certain why her mother was of such mind, but suspected that it was her old fashioned values that couldn't handle the fact that a gay couple should be allowed to have children and that her daughter could have any part in making it happen.

"Mum I…"

"Well it's about time, is all I will say. You've not really got anyone to palm her off onto now."

Ruth couldn't hold her frustration in any longer. "I have explained this a hundred times Mum," she hisses. "I didn't 'palm Grace off' to anyone!" Harry's eyes widen as he realises what her mother must be suggesting. He knows it's a difficult thing to understand; he's only just getting his head around it himself, but for her own family to be so callous about it?! She'd hinted earlier that not everyone she knew had been accepting of her choice. He wonders what her family said and it strikes him for the first time how brave Ruth must have been to stick by her decision in the face of all the animosity. A movement by the door catches his eye and he sees Grace looking at her mother curiously. He knows this has the ability to get ugly quite quickly so makes a decision, ushering Grace back into the living room; out of earshot of the conversation.

Ruth doesn't notice; too intent on setting her mother straight. "I made an informed choice to give her to Mark and Kevin before she was even conceived! I chose to have her for them; she wasn't some accident that I decided to give away on a whim, despite what you choose to believe."

"I think you need to calm down."

"No, what I need is a mother who accepts my decisions; who understands how hard this is going to be for both me and Grace and who provides support and comfort instead of belittling me. Now unless you can do all that, I don't want to speak to you. Don't ring again unless you change your attitude."

She hangs up angrily and looks around, expecting to find Harry looking at her, waiting for another explanation, but he's not there. As she calms herself down she hears his voice form the living room so returns to find him sat on the sofa reading to Grace. It's a sight that almost melts her heart until she reminds herself that she and Harry still have a lot to talk about and although they've made progress this morning he might not want to be part of her personal life any longer.

He feels her gaze on him and looks up with a smile "Hi," he greets. "Everything okay?"

"Everything's fine," she lies. She knows he'll see through her but he doesn't call her on it; he'll wait until she's ready to tell him. "Are you ready to build your snowman Grace?" Grace jumps up from the sofa excitedly and bounds out of the living room, Ruth and Harry following behind.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

_Still Saturday 20th January 2007…_

The snowman is finished and Grace is curled up on the sofa, her head in Ruth's lap, dozing quietly. It's been quite a morning. They'd been halfway through building it when Harry made a passing comment about how Scarlet would be in her element in the snow. Ever curious, Grace had asked who Scarlet was and her face had lit up when she'd been informed that Harry had a dog. Her first question had been when could she meet her? So, once they had finished the snowman and hurled a few snowballs around the garden with Ruth proving to be a better shot with snowballs than bullets as she managed to hit Harry square on the back of the head (which amused Grace no-end), they'd all bundled in to Harry's car and driven to his house. Grace had instantly fallen in love with Scarlet and it appeared that the feeling was reciprocated by the little Jack Russell. The three of them had taken her on a walk around the park and Grace had enjoyed throwing the ball for Scarlet to return. When it had been time to leave Grace had been so upset at the thought of being separated from Scarlet that Ruth had found herself inviting both Harry and the dog back to her house for lunch.

"Won't Fidget mind?" Harry had asked.

"I would doubt it; he's never held any real animosity towards dogs and besides, with Grace fussing over Scarlet he'll probably be glad of the rest."

So it had been decided and Harry had gathered a few of Scarlet's things whilst Ruth had secured Grace in the car. After a lunch of bacon sandwiches Grace had fallen asleep, the excitement of the morning and lack of sleep last night conspiring against her.

Ruth looks over at Harry reading her copy of the Telegraph and decides it's time to tell him about her conversation with her mother earlier. "I lied to you," she begins, only realising how bad it sounds when Harry looks up, startled. "Earlier I mean, when I came off the phone. You asked if everything was okay and I said it was but…"

"It didn't sound like it was going to be a good conversation, which is why I kept Grace occupied," he admits.

"Thank you for that," she says and proceeds to tell him almost word for word what was said.

"Oh Ruth," he sighs.

"She never really understood my decision and it became a bone of contention between us. I know it wasn't the ideal way to have your first grandchild brought into the world but it was my decision to make. She was offered the opportunity to see Grace and get to know her, by me as well as Mark and Kevin, but she refused every time."

"She probably just didn't understand why or how you could do it," Harry reasons.

Ruth shoots him a glare. "You mean how I could possibly give up my child?"

"Well yes, but not in the way you're obviously thinking that I mean it. What you did was an amazing thing and I know that most people would balk at the idea. They would focus on the love of a mother for the child and think you mustn't have cared enough about her, but actually you loved your best friend just as much and sacrificed so much to make him happy. I've always thought you were an amazing woman, and this just proves it. Such a selfless thing to do."

Harry's words bring tears to her eyes. "I just wish she could see that. Those first few weeks were hell for me," she admits looking down at her sleeping daughter. She's never told anyone this before "I loved her from the moment I held her and it floored me how strong my feelings were; I hadn't expected it and it was such a wrench to give her up. In my head I knew I'd done the right thing but my heart was telling my something different; my hormones were all over the place. I needed someone to tell me that it was going to be okay; that I'd done the right thing, but all I got was her telling me what an awful person I was."

"I saw Grace for the first time since the hospital when she was just a week old and it almost killed me so I stayed out of the way for a few weeks until I'd gotten my head together. Once my hormones calmed down I was able to see her and bond with her without it hurting so much when I left. I think my Mum likes to think that I left her there and never saw her but I saw her every week. I would babysit when Mark and Kevin wanted to go out and as she got older I would take her out and have her overnight. Like I said earlier, it probably did seem like a strange situation to most people but it worked; surprisingly well."

"Did you…" Harry stops unsure if he wants to risk opening old wounds, but her eyes implore him to continue. She's not been able to really talk about this with anyone before and it's only now that she has started that she realises she needs to. Harry seems to sense this and also realises that he needs to hear everything, no matter how hard it is for either of them, if there's any chance of them making a relationship work. "Did you never think of just taking her back?"

Ruth bites her lip. "For the first few months I thought about it every day but eventually the desire waned; only returning when I was able to spend time with her alone. I treasured the time we had, just the two of us, because it allowed me to live in a fantasy world where I'd never given her away and it was just me and her, making our way in the world together. But life isn't like that and reality always returned."

"Until last night,"

"Yes until then. But the reality of this situation is harsher than my fantasies ever were. God Harry, she's lost two of the most important people in her life, and I've lost my best friend. It's killing me inside, but at the same time the knowledge that I am going to be able to be her Mum…properly, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week is filling me with joy. Does that make me a horrible person?"

He rises and squeezes into the small space left between Ruth and the arm of the sofa. "No," he tells her honestly; "Horrible is a word I could never associate with you. Now I'm no Miranda Saunders-"

"Thank God for that," Ruth chuckles, thinking of their awful old psychologist.

Harry smiles. "As I was saying…I'm no Miranda Saunders but I think all those thoughts and feelings that you've just described, from the day Grace was born to now, show that you are human. It's your ability to put them aside and see the bigger picture that makes you extraordinary."

Ruth shakes her head lightly. "Harry I'm not-"

He places a finger to her lips to shush her. "You are!" he insists, dropping his finger when he's sure she won't protest. "And that's what makes you so bloody good at your job. Well, that and your ability to hack into any institution in the world."

Ruth looks startled. "Oh God! Work! What am I going to do? I've been so wrapped up in Grace that it never even occurred to me!"

"I think you can be forgiven for that. You need to take some leave." She's about to protest but he continues. "What other option do you have? She's not ready to be back at school; she needs her Mum and you can hardly bring her with you. Don't worry about The Grid; we'll manage. I'm not quite sure how, but we will." Seeing that she's not convinced, he adds, "Don't worry, if anything major happens we can always have Malcolm set you up with a secure connection from here."

"What will you tell them about why I'm off?"

"I'll tell them whatever you want me to," he assures.

"Just tell them I'm dealing with some family matters," she decides. "I know they need to know the truth, but I need to be the one to tell them, okay?"

"Okay," Harry agrees with a nod. A comfortable silence falls. They're still pressed very close together on the sofa and his hand is still lying just above her knee, where it landed when he dropped his finger from her lips minutes earlier.

"Thank you," she says. "For not running off."

Harry is confused. "Erm…not that I particularly want to remind you of this, but I did run."

"That was out of shock though; if anything I thought there'd be more chance of you leaving after you found out the whole sordid tale."

"There's nothing sordid about it," he scolds lightly and takes her hand in his. "I care about you Ruth; what I now know about your past and your current situation changes nothing. I still want to explore a more personal relationship with you…away from The Grid. If you still want to, that is?"

"I do Harry; I just need some time to get my…our lives together," she replies honestly, gesturing at Grace.

"Of course," he agrees. "Just let me know when you're ready. I'll be here."

* * *

**A/N:** Don't worry - as final as that might sound, there's still more to come! Time jump in the next chapter methinks.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

_Wednesday 28th March 2007…_

It's been just over two months since Grace came to live with Ruth and things are finally settling down. Grace is coping as well as can be expected and she's back at school and making progress; learning new things every day. Ruth is learning too as she grows in her role as Grace's mother on a full time basis; revelling in it. She's back at work; she returned a month after the funeral. She only works part time though, from 8.30 until 2 with Grace going to breakfast club at her school. It can be tricky if there's a red flash; as she has no-one to look after Grace, but Harry and the team have been understanding and, if she's needed, she works from home using the encrypted connection that Malcolm has installed for her.

To say the team were shocked when Ruth announced she had a daughter is something of an understatement but once they had gotten over the initial shock they'd been very supportive. Jo in particular has been a godsend; babysitting Grace when Ruth had to attend meetings with solicitors regarding Mark and Kevin's estate. Jo was the first person, other than Harry, who Ruth told about Grace. It was a few days before she was due to return to work; they'd arranged to meet for coffee. It had been a conversation that brought to two women even closer than before; and had given Ruth a lot to think about…

* * *

_As Ruth and Grace approached the café, Ruth spotted Jo sat in the table by the window and began to have second thoughts. She stopped on the pavement and Grace looked up at her._

_"What's wrong Mummy?" She tried to pull Ruth towards the door. "Come on Mummy! We're going to see your friend, aren't we?"_

_Friend? Would she describe any of the team as friends? Yes, they were like a second family; you had to be in their job but did they confide in each other as friends did? Sometimes she supposed they did and others not so much. But what choice did she have? She couldn't keep this from them any longer. So, shaking her head lightly to clear her thoughts, she and Grace entered the café hand in hand. _

_Jo looked up anxiously as the bell over the door went; she'd only been here a couple of minutes but it wasn't like Ruth to be late. She'd been very cryptic in her phone call as well, which had heightened Jo's suspicions. She was relieved to see Ruth enter, but her relief turned quickly to confusion as she saw Grace. _

_"Hi Jo," Ruth greeted as she approached the table. _

_Jo stood up to give Ruth a hug. "Hi!" She looked down at Grace. "Hello; what's your name." _

_Grace looked at her mother warily and Ruth nodded that it was okay; she was allowed to talk to this person. "I'm Grace."_

_"Well, it's nice to meet you Grace, I'm Jo," she replied as they all took their seats; Ruth retrieving a colouring book for Grace from her bag. Jo was looking at Ruth curiously waiting for an explanation but Ruth didn't get chance to say anything before a waitress approached them. _

_"What can I get for you?"_

_"I'll have a cappuccino please and," Ruth looked to her daughter, "what would you like sweetheart?"_

_Grace looked up from the picture she was colouring. "Can I have an orange juice please Mummy?" she asked politely._

_Jo's eyes went wide and she mouthed to Ruth 'Mummy?' Ruth ignored her for the moment; finishing her order. When the waitress had left, she turned back to Jo was stirring her tea, still looking wide-eyed at Ruth. "Are you going to tell me what's going on?" asked the younger agent, "Specifically why this little girl is calling you Mummy?"_

_"Because I am. Grace is my daughter."_

_Jo dropped her spoon into the cup. "But...how…I mean…how come we didn't know?"_

_"She's been living with her Dads…" Ruth proceeded to tell Jo the entire story; which was more than she had anticipated; she'd gone with the intentions of just telling her the bare minimum but once she'd started she'd found Jo so open and willing to listen that it all came tumbling out. _

_"Well Grace obviously adores you and I think you'll be a great Mum." Ruth had smiled at that. "What has Harry said?" Jo asked without really thinking. _

_"Why should Harry have said anything?" Ruth countered defensively. _

_"Well…I just thought that the two of you were…close," _

_"What exactly do you mean by close?"_

_"Well, you like him don't you?"_

_Ruth didn't know what to say; she knew there had been gossip before but she thought it had all died away. _

_"I like Harry!" piped up Grace. "He read to me and we went to his house; he's got a dog. When can we see Harry again Mummy?"_

_Jo gave Ruth a knowing look and she blushed. "Erm…I don't know Grace; I've told you before he's a very busy man."_

_"So Harry's met her then?" _

_"Oh alright! Yes. We were having dinner the night of the accident; when the police turned up."_

_"Not the way either of you planned the night to end, I'm sure!"_

_"Jo!" Ruth hissed before sighing, "I do wish you'd all stop discussing my private life."_

_Jo giggled. "Sorry. It's just that it seems so simple from where we're at; you like him, he likes you…what's stopping you?"_

_"Work, Grace….fear."_

_"You guys work brilliantly together; developing a personal relationship would only strengthen that. As for Grace; well she's just told you she likes him and it would appear he likes her. So that leaves fear…what are you scared of?"_

_"Losing him," she admits. "If it doesn't work out. Not being…enough for him."_

_"Ruth; that man hasn't looked at anybody else since you came along."_

_"How the hell do you know?"_

_"People talk. What I'm saying is; you'll be more than enough for him; le loves you. You've just got to stop pushing him away and let him show you how much."_

* * *

Ruth has thought of almost nothing but Jo's words since that day and she's analysed the situation to death. She had told Harry she wanted to see him again once things were settled down so she knows the ball is in her court. Harry is a gentleman and he won't push for anything without a signal from her. She just needs to find the right moment to broach the subject.

Ruth picks up the files of her desk and enters Harry's office without knocking. He's pouring over several files and rubbing his temple; a sign of stress.

"I've got those files you wanted as well as the weekly threat assessment and…" she trails off, knowing her next words will not be well received.

"Oh God, what?"

"…a few information requests from the CIA." She places the not-so-small bundle of files on his desk.

"Well they can go straight in the shredder. We are not playing bloody dogsbody for the cousins!"

"Shall I tell them that?"

"Yes. Word. For. Word!"

"Is everything okay?" she asks tentatively.

"It's this bloody recruitment drive! I've got applications for field officers and analysts coming out of my ears. Everybody wants to be bloody James Bond! And I've got a meeting with the Home Secretary in…" he looks at his watch "Oh God, twenty minutes."

"Would you like a hand?" she offers. "I could sift through the chaff for you if you like?"

"I can't ask you to do that; you're finishing in 10 minutes and you have to pick up Grace."

"Well how about I take them home and look at them once Grace is asleep..." The Gods must be smiling on her today; could this be the opportunity she's been waiting for. With Jo's words ringing in her ears she takes a deep breath, "Or perhaps you'd like to come round after your meeting and we could look at them together… I could cook… that's if you want to?"

"I…Are you're sure Grace won't mind me intruding?"

"Oh no, she'll be thrilled; she's been asking when she'll see you again."

"Really?" Harry is sceptical.

"Well, I'll admit it might be more to do with Scarlet…" Ruth teases.

"Oh charming!"

"…but she does like you."

Harry shakes his head. "She doesn't know me."

Ruth wrings her hands in front of her, wishing she still had the files to hold on to. "Maybe it's time she did."

Harry feels a surge of hope deep inside of him…is she saying what he thinks she's saying. "Ruth… do you… I mean… wha-?"

She smiles at his sudden inability to form a sentence; he obviously suspects where this is going. "Things are settling down for Grace and I now, and although we're not quite there yet… well, I miss you Harry."

"I... I miss you too. Dinner sounds wonderful; what time?"

"Whenever your meeting finishes?"

"I'll nip home and change and then I'll come round. Shall I bring Scarlet?"

"Grace would love it if you did."

"Then I shall."


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

_Wednesday 28th March 2007… 6.35pm_

Ruth is rushing around, tidying up the house for Harry's arrival. Since picking Grace up from school she has tided the living room and the kitchen, prepared a meal for her and Harry, which is currently slow cooking in the oven, sorted the recruitment files into two piles; definites and possibles, and has fed and bathed Grace. But in the ten minutes since Grace has been downstairs again she has managed to turn the living room into something resembling Toys 'R' Us after an explosion.

"Grace, can you please put yours dolls away," she asks for the third time.

"But Mummy I'm playing."

"You're not playing; you're reading."

"I'm reading to my dollies," she states.

Ruth rolls her eyes. "Grace, I will not ask you again."

"But Mummy!"

"Now please."

Grace does as she is askes but not without a considerable amount of huffing about it. She's just putting the last one in her toy box when the doorbell rings. "Harry's here!" she cries, dropping the doll and running to open the door. "Hiya!"

"Hello," chuckles Harry, amused at her exuberance.

She beams at him before bending down to pat Scarlet. "Hello Scarlet. Can I take her please?" she asks Harry.

Harry hands her the lead. "There you go. Once you're inside you can unclip her lead if you like?"

"Okay," she nods, leading the dog inside, past Ruth who had followed her into the hallway.

She moves forward to greet Harry with a smile. "Hi, come in." He puts the bag of Scarlet's things down and Ruth takes his coat and hangs it on the bannister. "How was your meeting?"

"Long. Boring. God that man knows how to witter on!"

A sympathetic touch on the arm from Ruth and the atmosphere between them sizzles; they pause and stare at each other. He drops his gaze to her mouth and her tongue involuntarily sneaks out and licks her lips. He leans in for a kiss...

"Mummy! I think Scarlet wants to go outside!" Grace rushes in and Harry and Ruth spring apart, avoiding eye contact.

"I'll just go and deal with…that," Harry says, heading to the back door to let the dog out into the garden.

* * *

Half an hour later and it's Grace's bedtime, but she's not eager to say goodnight to Harry and Scarlet.

"But I don't want to go to bed; I'm not tired!" she insists.

"It's a school night, Grace," Ruth explains. "Plus, Harry and I need to have our meal."

"Please can I have a few more minutes?"

"No." Ruth is resolute. Harry watches with amusement as Grace tries every trick in the book to stay up from saying she's thirsty to scared to needing to tidy her room, just as both his own children had done when they were younger. Eventually Ruth has had enough. "Grace, you can go to bed now or you can continue defying me, which will mean there won't be time for a story. It's up to you." Grace goes quiet. "Well?" Ruth asks.

"I'll go to bed now," she mumbles. "But-"

"What?"

"Can Harry read to me?" she asks shyly.

"Are you sure?" Harry checks.

Grace nods, looking at him with puppy dog eyes. "Last time you read to me, you did funny voices," she explains.

Harry looks to Ruth. "Is that okay with you?"

"Erm…sure. It will give me chance to put the finishing touches to dinner." Turning to Grace she sends her off to wash her face and brush her teeth before addressing Harry again. "Don't let her sweet talk you into more than one story," she warns.

"I won't," he assures.

"And tell her I'll be up to say goodnight once you've finished." Harry nods and pads up the stairs.

* * *

Harry meets Grace at the top of the stairs as she's exiting the bathroom. "Right then, which one is your room?"

Grace takes his hand and leads him into a room at the end of the landing. It's a typical young girls bedroom; bright, cheerful and full of soft toys. Not much pink though, he notes and wonders if that's down to Ruth.

"Do you like it?"

"I do. I have to say, I thought it would be pinker though," he admits.

"I don't really like pink."

"My little girl loved it; for about two years."

"You have a little girl? Can I play with her?"

"I have a son too; they're both grown up now though."

"Oh. Okay."

"So what are we reading?"

Grace reaches up for a book from her bookcase and hands it to Harry. "Room on the Broom," she informs him. "It's my favourite."

Harry turns back the bed covers and Grace scrambles in and, as Harry tucks the blankets tightly around her he is reminded of the rare occasions he did this with his own children. It wasn't often enough; he knows and is ashamed of his behaviour then. He thought he could have it all, work, family, lovers, but he was young and naïve believing he could balance them all. It was only a matter of time before one of the many plates he was spinning fell to the floor and smashed to pieces. The first one to go was his marriage and as a result, the relationship with his children. He was a wiser man now; but no amount of wisdom can change the past.

"I'm ready now," Grace whispers as if she can sense Harry shouldn't really be disturbed.

"Right, well then…" he opens the book and begins to read. "The witch had a cat and a very tall hat and long ginger hair which she wore in a plait. How the cat purred and how the witch grinned as they sat on their broomstick and flew through the wind. But how the witch wailed and how the cat spat when the wind blew so wildly it blew off her hat! 'Down' cried the witch and they flew to the ground. They searched for the hat but no hat could be found. Then out of the bushes on thundering paws, there bounded a dog with the hat in his jaws. He dropped it politely then eagerly said (as the witch pulled the hat firmly down on her head)," Harry pauses for dramatic emphasis and clears his throat, "'I'm a dog as keen as can be," he continues in a silly gruff voice, "is there room on the broom for a dog like me?"

Grace giggles at Harry's voice for the dog and his one for the bird and for the frog, and she joins in completing some of the rhyming strings with him. She enjoys sharing the book with him, laughing and smiling as he reads.

Downstairs, Ruth has finished her final preparations for dinner; all that is needed now it for the vegetables to finish boiling. So, finding herself at a loose end, she decides to check on Harry and Grace. She hears Grace's giggles as she climbs the stairs and smiles to herself; it seems another Evershed female has fallen for Harry's charms.

She stops outside Grace's door which has been left ajar slightly. She knows she should announce her presence but she can't quite bring herself to; wanting to observe the way the two most important people in her life were getting along. She can hear Harry's dulcet tones reading the final lines of 'Room with a Broom' and rolls her eyes; she should've known Grace would choose that book.

"The End," the room's occupants say in unison as Harry closes the book.

"Well, that's that," Harry says. "I'll go tell your Mum to come and say good night."

Ruth moves away from the door, so as not to be spotted but Grace calls out to Harry, her next words stopping both adults in their tracks. "Harry… are you Mummy's boyfriend?"

* * *

**A/N:** 'Room on the Broom' is a real book by Julia Donaldson and is used here without permission, but just for fun. It's available to buy in all good book shops :)


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9**

_Previously..._

_Grace calls out to Harry, her next words stopping both adults in their tracks. "Harry…are you Mummy's boyfriend?"_

* * *

Harry is flustered by her question. "I…erm…no. What makes you ask that?"

Grace shrugs. "You brought her flowers and before you were going to kiss her!"

"I…when?"

"When Scarlet wanted to go outside," Grace states. Harry blushes, he hadn't realised the little girl had seen them. "And she likes you; she always smiles when she sees you or talks to you."

Harry is amazed by the girl's perceptiveness, but then reasons that he shouldn't be; she is Ruth's daughter after all. "Grace, your Mum and I…well, it's complicated."

"Do you not love her?" Grace asks sadly.

"It's not that."

"So you do love her?"

"I…I care about your Mummy very much."

"But do you love her?" Harry is silent – what does he say? Eventually Grace gets bored of waiting. "I want you to be Mummy's boyfriend. You're nice; I like you."

"Right; I'll bear that in mind. I'll go and get your Mum."

Ruth is still standing outside the door and has been struck dumb by what she has heard. So much so that her reactions are delayed and she doesn't manage to move out of the way in time. Harry stops dead when he sees her. He can tell from the blush in her cheeks that she's heard every word.

"I... I came up to see how you were doing and make sure she wasn't being any trouble. I didn't mean to…"

"It's okay Ruth," he assures, placing his hands on her shoulders to calm her. "I'll be downstairs."

He walks past her and she puts a hand out to stop him. "You're…you're not going to leave are you?"

"No, I'm not."

* * *

Ruth isn't subjected to any such interrogation when she goes in to bid Grace goodnight. On one hand she is relieved but on the other not, as she had wanted to use it a springboard for a discussion about not asking such personal questions. As it is, she decides it would probably be too late for such a talk anyway so files it away for future reference.

She makes her way back to the kitchen to find Harry dishing up the food. "You didn't have to do this," she tells him. "I was cooking remember."

"You did cook," he argues. "I merely put it out on plates."

"Yes but why?"

"Because if those potatoes had been left on the boil any longer they'd be mush by now."

"Ah."

"Yes, so," he places the plates on the table, "let's eat."

"Hang on," she replies, opening the fridge and producing a bottle of wine. She uncorks it and then pours them both a glass.

"White Burgundy," he observes, taking a sip.

"I thought it was…appropriate."

"You chose red last time you cooked," he recalls, remembering the night two months ago which had held such promise until the police had arrived.

"Well, it went better with the meal and besides, this meal is something of a fresh start so I thought repeating some small details would be nice."

"I thought I recognised that skirt!" She smiles bashfully; he has noticed. "Sit down; eat." She does as he beckons, but doesn't eat; merely pushes her food round her plate. "Ruth? What's wrong?"

"About what Grace said; I'm sorry. I must have a word with her about inappropriate questions."

"It's fine, Ruth. Honestly. She's just curious; you can't blame her for that. Now come on, eat up."

Feeling slightly better she begins to eat. "I hope it's okay," she says, gesturing at the food, "it's a new recipe for me."

"It's delicious," he replies sincerely, earning another blush.

"Thank you. I've had a look through the files; got it down to three definite candidates for analyst and four for case officer; with a couple of other possibles. I wasn't sure how many firm candidates you wanted."

"I think Debra Langham was looking for four or five of each to call for interview, so thank you. You've done practically all the work for me." He re-fills her wine glass.

"It was nothing," she shrugs. "I did it while Grace was eating her tea."

"Well, thank you anyway."

They continue to make small talk as they eat, each ignoring the elephant in the room. It's only when they move through to the living room that Ruth turns quiet again.

"Look, do you want me to go?" Harry asks, feeling quite despondent at the way the night seems to be going.

"Wha-? No, no. I'm sorry…I was just thinking, that's all."

"About?"

"Before…upstairs…you didn't answer Grace's question."

"Which question?"

"She asked if you loved me. Y-you didn't give her a definitive answer."

"Well, call me old fashioned but I believe a man should tell a woman how he feels about her before he tells her daughter."

"And…how do you feel…about me?"

He scoots closer to her on the sofa and takes her hand. Turning her head to his, he looks deep into her eyes. "I love you."

There's nothing quite like hearing those three little words and Ruth is overcome by her emotions. "Oh Harry! I love you too"

She cups his cheek and leans towards him, kissing him. Feeling his lips against hers for the first time. It's heaven. He kisses back passionately, determinedly. Before either of them know what's happening he's pushed her back against the cushions and is hovering over her. She revels in the feeling of his weight above her as they begin to explore each other's bodies. His hand snakes up and down her side, teasing the curve of her breast through the fabric of her shirt. As he kisses her neck she palms at the strong muscles in his back, clutching on for dear life. The feelings he stirs in her are sensuous; she never wants him to stop. This time, when he reaches the hem of her skirt his fingers snake underneath, caressing her soft skin. Her hands find their way to his denim clad rear. Her mouth finds his neck. She sucks. Hard. It makes him crazy. He loses control and seconds later, his hand is toying with the lace of her bra.

When his finger dips beneath the lace and finds her nipple she arches towards him, her lower half coming into contact with the growing bulge in his jeans. It arouses her, but it also brings her to her senses. They can't do this here. They're not a couple of teenagers; they should be above groping on the couch. She places a hand on his chest and pushes him up. Gently but insistently. He obliges, pulling away. They are both breathing hard.

"I think…we should…take this…upstairs," she pants.

He sits up then, thinking his mind must be clouded; there's no way she could have just said what he thought she said. "P-pardon?"

"Come upstairs," she repeats with an air of confidence he's never seen from her before. She takes his hand and stands up.

He remains seated but doesn't let go. "A-are you sure?" He wonders for a fleeting moment why he is questioning her; this is what he's dreamt about. But then he remembers…it's more than lust. It's love and he doesn't want to ruin it.

"I'm sure." She tugs on his hand this time, forcing him to stand. She steps into him, and runs her hands over his chest. "I want this Harry."

"Hells bells, Ruth!" He pulls her flush against him and captures her lips with his. Passion and electricity flow between them.

Somehow they make it upstairs and are just outside her bedroom door when Harry has a thought. "What about Grace?" he whispers

"She's a _very_ heavy sleeper," Ruth tells him, as her fingers make quick work of the buttons on his shirt, "and this is an old house; it's got thick walls."

Harry pushes her into the room and kicks the door shut behind him, praying that Ruth is right because now that they've started he doesn't think he'll be able to stop.

* * *

**A/N:** Can't promise when the next update will be. I normally have a couple of chapters in reserve but this is the last one I have written at the moment. Please bear with me; I'll continue as soon as I can.


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10**

_Thursday 29th March 2007_

Ruth is unsure how long the ray of sunlight has been peeking through the gap in the curtains before it finds its way to her face; nor does she know how long it takes her to become aware of it. She fights to ignore the errant sunbeam to get back to her wonderful dream where she and Harry had been walking along a white sandy beach, but the moment has passed. Sounds begin to register in her brain. A car door slams outside. A dog barks. She's awake now.

Reluctantly she rubs her eyes to drive away the last vestiges of sleep and looks over at her bed companion. Harry is lying on his front and the sheet has slipped down, exposing the majority of his back. She aches to run her fingers over his skin; to feel it once more, but she resists the temptation. He looks so peaceful; more so than she's ever seen him look in his waking hours, so she leaves him. Slipping from the bed she finds some clean clothes and, not wanting to disturb him, makes her way to the bathroom to change.

Once dressed she makes her way downstairs, letting Scarlet out and providing food for the two animals. Then she makes a start on clearing up after last night's meal. She is on her second bowl of water when she hears her daughter's soft footfalls on the stairs.

"Morning Mummy," she greets entering the kitchen.

Ruth gives her a kiss and a cuddle. "Good morning Gracie. Breakfast?"

"Can I have egg and soldiers please?"

"Of course," Ruth beams. "Do you want to go and get your activity book for while you're waiting?"

Grace gets the suggested items and returns to the kitchen just in time to see Ruth let Scarlet back in. "Scarlet!" she beams rushing over and petting her.

After a few minutes Ruth has to intervene. "Come on sweetheart; poor Scarlet wants her breakfast. Leave her in peace."

Grace does as she's told, albeit a little reluctantly and returns to the table. She and Ruth play out their morning ritual; working on an intellectual activity as they wait for breakfast to be ready. Suddenly a thought occurs to Grace. "Mummy why is Scarlet here? Did Harry forget her?"

"No sweetie, he didn't forget her."

"So he left her here? Why?"

"He didn't leave her," Ruth explains. "He stayed over too."

"Oh. Where is he?"

"He's still in bed."

"Oh." She returns to her work for a few moments before coming up with another question. "Where did Harry sleep?"

"In my bed," Ruth answers honestly.

"Where did you sleep then?"

"I slept in my bed too."

"You shared?" Grace enquires.

"Yes," smiles Ruth, placing her daughter's breakfast in front of her.

"Like Daddy and Papa used to?"

"I suppose so yes."

Grace is confused. "But…Harry said he wasn't your boyfriend."

Harry appears at the door, but remains unseen but either occupants of the kitchen. "He wasn't then, when you asked him but after dinner Harry and I had a good talk and we decided that we'd both like it if we tried to be…together," Ruth explains

"So you're boyfriend and girlfriend now?"

Ruth nods. "Is that okay?" she checks.

"Yeh," Grace says with a nod. "I like him. I'm glad he's your boyfriend."

Harry decides to make his presence known. "It's been a long time since I've been described as somebody's boyfriend," he quips. "Bit too old I think."

"You're silly," giggles Grace.

"And good morning to you," Harry retorts, ruffling her hair.

"Hey!" she shrieks, laughing and wriggling away.

"Don't I get a good morning?" Ruth asks.

Harry crosses the kitchen to her. He glances back at Grace and sees she is engrossed in eating her breakfast, so steals a kiss from Ruth. "Morning. I missed you; I don't like waking up alone," he whispers.

"Sorry. I didn't want to disturb you. You looked so…peaceful." Harry grimaces at that description, earning a smile from Ruth. "You did," she insists.

"Well it's hardly surprising after last night is it; they say nothing relaxes you like a good round of-"

Ruth glares at him. "Breakfast?"

"Just some toast thanks," he replies with a cheeky smile.

Harry and Ruth eat their breakfast while Grace gets herself ready for school. Harry drives them, much to Grace's delight, and once she's been dropped off Harry drops Ruth for the tube before going home to change.

* * *

_Saturday 28th April 2007…_

One month later and Harry and Ruth are still together. They're taking things slowly but are making progress. Navigating the storms at work is still difficult; finding a balance and keeping their personal feelings off The Grid, but they're getting there. Ruth and Grace had met Catherine whilst she was back in London for Easter and the previous week Harry had attended Grace's 6th birthday party where he had, much to his surprise, been a big hit with all her friends.

This morning though, is a quiet, regular Saturday at Ruth's house. Harry sits with Grace at the breakfast table while Ruth has a shower. "Are you still okay with the plan for tonight?" he asks.

She nods enthusiastically. "Yeh. I can't wait!"

"Good. Do you think you can you keep it a secret for a few more hours?" he whispers conspiratorially.

"Yeh," she agrees.

"And you remember the plan for keeping Mummy busy this morning?" Grace nods again. "Good. That's that settled then."

"What's settled?" Ruth asks as she enters, towel drying her hair. She eyes them suspiciously. "What are you two plotting?"

"Erm…nothing!" Harry replies a little unconvincingly. "We were just talking about erm…what Grace wants to do today."

Ruth looks to Grace, trying to catch them out. But Grace knows their cover story. "Yeh…I want to watch Toy Story!"

"Again?" Ruth asks. "You only watched it last night."

"She obviously enjoys it," Harry intervenes.

"Okay, but then you'll spend some time outside. It's a lovely day."

"You will watch it with me Mummy won't you?" Grace asks.

"Oh…erm, well I…"

"Please Mummy!" she begs with puppy dog eyes.

"Oh, okay then," caves Ruth. "We'll watch it together."

"Right, and while you do that, I can have a shower and fix that bathroom door for you." He winks at Grace…they're on.

"Come on Mummy!" Grace says dragging her out of the kitchen before she can protest. "To Infinity and Beyond!"

Harry smiles; if that performance was anything to go by, Grace would make a top class agent one day. Shaking his head, for he's sure Ruth wouldn't want that for her daughter, he heads upstairs to implement the second phase of his plan.


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N:** Apologies for the delay – real life has taken over at the mo!

* * *

**Chapter 11**

_Saturday 28__th__ April 2007…_

Once Toy Story has finished, Harry and Ruth take Grace to the park and the three of them have lunch in the café by the lake. They are home all of ten minutes when the doorbell rings.

"Now who can that be?" asks Ruth rhetorically.

"There's an easy way to find out," Harry quips, earning him a throw cushion to the face. Grace is highly amused and Ruth can still hear her laughing as she opens the front door.

Her jaw drops when she sees who is on the other side. "Sheila!?"

"Hello Ruth dear," greets Mark's mother with a brief hug.

"Erm…come in."

"Thanks."

Ruth turns to lead Sheila into the living room and finds Harry and Grace stood in the doorway, sharing a conspiratorial smile. Grace runs up and gives her Grandma a big hug.

"What's going on?" Ruth asks looking to and from Harry and Sheila.

Harry steps forward, but not to greet Ruth. "Hi Sheila, I'm Harry. Thank you for doing this."

"Harry! It's nice to put a face to the name...and the voice. And it's hardly chore to spend time with my Granddaughter."

"Well, I really appreciate it."

Ruth is frustrated that she is being kept out of the loop. "Would someone please tell me what's going on?"

"It's a surprise!" Grace tells her.

"I knew you two were plotting something! What is it?"

Grace looks to Harry and he nods his consent. "I'm going to sleep at Grandma and Granddad's."

Ruth looks to Harry. "Why?"

"So that I can take you out for a meal. You haven't forgotten what tomorrow is, have you?"

Ruth thinks for a moment and then realisation dawns. "My birthday." Harry and Grace nod. "I can't believe I forgot."

"I think that's understandable; you have had a lot on your plate recently," Harry replies before turning to Grace. "Grace, why don't you go and get your bag; it's in the bottom of your wardrobe." Grace runs off smiling.

"When did you have time to…" she trails off as she realises how she was played that morning. "Toy Story?"

Harry nods. Ruth is astonished that she fell for it and voices her bewilderment. "How did I not work this out?"

"We were sneaky!" declares Grace bounding back down the stairs with her bag in one hand and her teddy in the other.

"You certainly were," agrees Ruth with a smile, checking through her bag to make sure Harry hasn't forgotten anything. She is pleasantly surprised to see that he hasn't. He's even packed her nightlight.

"So, is it okay?" Harry asks. "Will you let me take you out?"

"Well, once again you're being rather presumptuous but I suppose I should be used to that by now." She smiles at him, letting him know she's not really upset; she's teasing.

"Is that a yes?"

"Of course it is, you daft man. As if I'm going to turn down the promise of a night out."

He smiles. "Good."

"Do you want a drink, Sheila?" Ruth asks hospitably.

"We'll have to be going actually; I've got to pick Jim up from the golf club soon."

"Another time then," Ruth offers and Sheila nods.

"I'd like that."

"Come on Grace, it's time to go," beckons Ruth. Grace says goodbye to Harry. He in turn ruffles her hair and tells her to have fun, before Ruth and Sheila take her out the car. Ruth transfers the car seat and secures her daughter in it; double checking she is strapped in properly. "You be good for Grandma Sheila, okay?"

"I will," Grace nods.

Ruth places a kiss on her forehead and shuts the car door. Sheila is waiting by the driver's door.

"Thank you for doing this," Ruth says. "I hope you haven't had to re-arrange anything."

"Ruth," Sheila says firmly. "I've already told you, it's fine. Stop worrying about us and just enjoy your evening. Harry's put a lot of thought and effort into it."

"I'm sure he has; he's not one for doing things by halves."

"He seems like a good man," Sheila observes.

"He is," Ruth agrees. "Do you think Mark…" she trails off as she realises how silly she must sound.

Sheila seems to sense Ruth's question. "Do I think Mark would have approved of Harry?"

Ruth nods. "I know it's daft and I wouldn't have needed his consent or approval but he was my best friend and he'd normally have a comment or two about who I was seeing…about how they weren't good enough for me.

"Probably because they weren't," Sheila tells her truthfully. "But I think he'd like Harry; it's obvious how much he cares about you and Grace." A blush creeps up Ruth's cheeks but it doesn't stop Sheila, who puts her hand on Ruth's upper arm and rubs. "I'm glad you have someone…and Mark would be too."

"Harry's not going to try and replace Mark in her eyes," Ruth explains.

"It never occurred to me that he would."

"And I meant what I said after the funeral; no matter what happens in the future; I want you involved in Grace's life."

"Ruth. Stop. I know. You don't owe me any explanations. You're happy; that's all that matters."

"Thank you," Ruth replies, trying not to get choked up. Sheila has practically been a second mother to her since she and Mark met and Ruth values her opinion highly.

"Now, you should get back inside. It's getting cold and Harry will be wondering what has happened to you." The two women embrace and Ruth waves them off before returning to the house.

Ruth enters the living room to find Harry stretched out on her sofa, watching the football results come through. Ruth tidies up a few of her toys before joining Harry, who's now shifted over, on the sofa. They sit quietly, the only sounds being those of the television presenters. After a few minutes, Harry breaks the silence. "You okay?"

"It's strange without Grace; too quiet."

"Most mothers would be glad of the peace."

"I know; and I am, but it just brings back memories of before…when she'd go back to Mark and Kevin."

Harry wraps his arms around her. "She'll be back before you know it," he tells her. "We can go and pick her up as soon as you want to tomorrow."

"I know. Sorry. Here we are, properly alone for the first time since we got together and all I can do is mope."

"I know something that could take your mind off it?" he whispers seductively.

"Oh really?" she asks, raising an eyebrow.

"Mmm-hmm," he murmurs, touching his lips to her neck and kissing upwards towards her ear.

"Have we got time?" she asks, her breath catching slightly as he finds a particularly sensitive spot.

"Plenty. Our reservation isn't until eight."

"Then what are we waiting for?" she asks. His answer is to capture her lips in a passionate kiss.


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12**

_Still Saturday 28th April 2007, 7.05pm_

Harry is waiting at the bottom of the stairs, pacing. He wants tonight to go well; it's the first time he's organised anything for just the two of them since he took her out on their first date. He fingers the small box in his pocket with nerves. They disappear instantly though when Ruth appears on the landing. She's a vision of beauty in a black satin dress with an embroidered bodice and sheer, shimmering lace sleeves. The dress flatters her shape; accentuating her every curve, and the long pendant she has paired with it draws attention to her cleavage. She smiles shyly under his scrutiny and descends the stairs. She stops in front of him and he finally manages lift his eyes to her face. Her hair is swept up in a chignon; a few tendrils falling loosely to frame her face.

"Hells bells Ruth! You look...divine."

She blushes profusely. "Thank you." She fingers his tie; pulling tight to his collar. "You look good too; very handsome."

"Well, I try." He offers her his arm. "Shall we?"

Ruth takes his arm with a smile and they leave for their evening.

* * *

They enjoy a lovely Italian meal after which they take a walk along the south bank of the river, passing the National Theatre and the BFI. As they pass the Hungerford Bridge and enter Jubilee Gardens Harry slows his pace. Ruth looks at him inquisitively. "How are you with heights?" he asks.

"Remind me again, how many conversations we've had on the roof of Thames House," she comments glancing in the direction of their workplace.

"I was thinking of something a little higher," he admits.

As she turns back to look at him, her eyes fall on the London Eye and she realises what he has planned. "The Eye?"

He nods. "You've not been on it before have you?"

"No. Even though I live in the city; I rarely take time to appreciate all it has to offer."

"Well now you can. London by night; from one of the best viewpoints there is." He tugs on her hand. "Come on."

"As they approach, she notices the darkened kiosks. "Erm Harry; not that I want to rain on your parade but I think it's closed."

"Nonsense." He strides right up to the ticket office and raps on the window. A door opens and they are greeted by one of the hosts.

"Hello Harry."

"Hello again Gerry. Gerry, this is Ruth Evershed. Ruth this is Gerry; an old acquaintance of mine." She understands now; Harry has pulled some strings; to get his friend to open the eye specifically for them. Typical Harry; not being content with a private pod; because that's available to everyone. He wanted something different; something special.

"Everything okay for our trip," Harry checks with Gerry.

"Aye; all sorted. You've got a lovely night for it. If you'd like to follow me I'll show you to your capsule."

* * *

When they enter the capsule Ruth and Harry are greeted with a carpet of rose petals. On the table are a bottle of Pommery Brut Royal Champagne and a box of Hotel Chocolat truffles.

"Oh Harry!" gasps Ruth as she takes in the site before her.

He wraps his arm around her and kisses her. "Happy Birthday."

Gerry clears his throat gently and Harry and Ruth pull apart, slightly embarrassed. "Technically, I'm supposed to accompany all guests on their trips but if I can trust anyone it's you, right Harry?"

"Of course Gerry."

Making a discrete exit, Gerry secures the capsule doors and returns to the controls. A few moments later the wheel begins to move and they begin their ascent. They travel up, enjoying the magnificent views along the river. As they do, they discuss the buildings; Ruth imparting some little known wisdom about their architecture or history while Harry listens intently and adds his own anecdotes about them from his years in the service. The capsule stops at the very top and affords them a panorama of the city like nowhere else. It is then that Harry leads Ruth to sit down on the seat in the middle of the capsule. He sits next to her and reaches into his pocket for the little box he's been guarding all evening. He slides it across the little gap between them. "Happy birthday Ruth," he whispers.

She gazes down at the black velvet box and her eyes widen. "Harry I can't…it's too soon."

Harry is confused. "Ruth, what do you mean it's too soon? It's j…" but he trails off as he realises what she's thinking; that she's misunderstood. He picks up the box and opens it. Ruth closes her eyes, not trusting her reactions if she lays eyes on the contents. "Ruth," he implores. "It's okay." He cups her face, brushing his finger over her cheek. She relaxes at this and allows herself to open her eyes. He shows her the open box.

"Oh," she murmurs, an embarrassed smile appearing on her face. Inside the box, nestled in the cushion, is a pair of diamond stud earrings. "Harry; they're beautiful."

"I'm glad you like them."

"They look expensive," Ruth observes.

"Never you mind about that," he instructs. "You're worth every penny."

"Thank you," she replies with a blush. She closes the gap between them and kisses him lovingly.

When they pull apart, he fixes her with a teasing gaze. "Not too soon for them after all then?"

Her blush deepens and she rises to look out of the capsule. "Did you know that the last MP ever to be imprisoned in the clock tower was Charles Bradlaugh, founder of the National Secular Society, because he refused to take the religious Parliamentary Oath?"

"Yes I did. You're not getting out of it that easily. You thought I was going to propose, yes?"

She nods, but keeps her eyes fixed on the London skyline. "It was just the romantic setting, the black box, your nerves… I just assumed… I'm sorry."

"You don't need to apologise. Although I'll admit to being a little disappointed that you are so set against marrying me."

"I didn't say that!" protests Ruth, spinning round to face him.

"So you do want to marry me?"

"I…" she trails off, noticing the smirk he fails to hide. "Oh, you insufferable man!"

"I'm sorry; I just couldn't resist."

"It isn't that I have any particular objection to marrying you," she continues, turning back to look out over the city. "It's just that…"

He approaches her and wraps his arms around her from behind. "Relax Ruth; I'm perfectly aware it's too soon for us."

"Y…you are?"

"Of course; we've only been together a month after all. As much as I can see us getting married in the future; we're not ready yet."

"You see us getting married?" Ruth is surprised by his willingness to admit this.

"Of course, don't you?"

"I…I'll admit to having thought about it."

"I see lots of things for us in the future," Harry continues

"You do? Like what?" She's curious to see if his private thoughts and fantasies are the same as hers.

"Exploring the city, going on holiday…."

"The Grand Tour?"

"One day, yes. Maybe when Grace is older."

"What else?"

"Living together, getting married…having kids," he gives her time in case she needs to digest his words.

She doesn't; they match her own wishes. "I'd like that…eventually."

"And of course…lots of sex," he adds.

She giggles at that. "You do realise that it's virtually impossible to have both kids and a healthy sex life don't you?"

"We don't do too badly," he points out.

"No, I suppose we don't. It would be nice not to have to be…" she searches for the words.

"Quiet? Restrained?" Harry suggests.

"…always on guard in case she bursts in."

"Well we won't have that problem tonight."

"No, we won't," she agrees.

"If anyone busts in I shall be complaining to the hotel management."

"Hotel?"

"Yes. We're staying at The Lanesborough."

"Oh Harry!" she gushes. The Lanesborough is a Regency hotel overlooking Hyde Park and Ruth has dreamt of staying there. She plants a kiss on his lips. "You wonderful, wonderful man."

"A few moments ago, you said I was insufferable," he reminds.

"Yes well, I think you've redeemed yourself. Thank you; you've put so much effort into tonight…and it's not even a special birthday."

"It's your first one since we've been together; that makes it special."

She wraps her arms around him and kisses him. It's a kiss filled with love and commitment; as if they're sealing their future together in that moment. "I love you Harry Pearce."

"I love you too Ruth."

* * *

**A/N:** Probably just an epilogue to go now. Can't promise when it'll be up though - although I break up for half term on Friday so should be within the next 2 weeks.


	13. Epilogue

**A/N: **Well, here we are…the final instalment. This epilogue is actually longer than any of the actual chapters but I'm sure that won't bother you. I hadn't intended it to be this long but once I started writing I just couldn't stop.

* * *

**Epilogue**

_Saturday 15th May 2027…_

Grace stands in front of the mirror smoothing down her dress and picking imaginary bits of flint of it.

"It's fine, stop fiddling with it," calls Fion. Grace carries on and Fion sighs. "Mum, will you tell her?"

"Your sister's right," adds Ruth coming up behind her. "It's beautiful…you're beautiful."

"You have to say that, you're my mother."

"I mean every word." Ruth insists.

Grace blushes and smiles at her mother. "Thank you."

"Are you nervous?" Ruth asks her daughter.

Grace shakes her head. "I've got butterflies but I think that's from the excitement," she tells her.

"Were you nervous when you married Dad?" Fion asks.

"No. It was a small ceremony with only a handful of people present and I was marrying the man I loved. What was there to be nervous about?"

"Awwww!" the girls chorus and this time it's Ruth's turn to blush.

There is a small knock at the door and Harry's voice can be heard from the other side. "Can I come in?"

Ruth opens the door for him and he enters, dressed in his morning suit and carrying the top hat under his arm. He kisses her in greeting, "I like that dress," he tells her, his eye running up and down her body. Even in their later years, he finds his wife irresistible. Placing his hat on the small table by the door, he looks at Grace, taking in her beauty, and Ruth can see how difficult today is going to be for him. Ever since that night 20 years ago when Grace had lost her fathers, Harry has been the main male role model in her life. He might not have been her biological father but he loved her as if she was, even when he and Ruth had a child of their own. When Ruth had discovered she was pregnant with Fion 5 months after their wedding, Grace, who was 8 years old, had admitted privately to her mother that she was scared Harry would love the new baby more than he loved her. Ruth had reassured her daughter that that wouldn't happen but Grace's words had roused her worries too. Fortunately it never happened; Harry loved both girls equally.

Sensing the need for Harry and Grace to be alone, Ruth ushers her youngest daughter out of the room; saying she's left something in her room and needs her help to find it. Fion is about to argue but Ruth fixes her with a stare that she knows not to argue with. So, after kissing her father on the cheek, she follows her mother out of the room.

Alone with Grace, Harry finally speaks. "You look amazing." Grace blushes and looks down. "No you don't" he insists, lifting her head back up to look at her. "I mean it. Your Dads would have been really proud of you today."

"Thank you."

"And as a matter of fact, so am I," he adds.

Grace feels tears pool in her eyes and dabs at them with a tissue. "Stop it or I'll ruin my make up," she admonishes.

"Sorry. I have something for you," he says, delving into his jacket pocket. He hands her a small velvet box and she eyes it curiously. "Your mother mentioned you were struggling to find something old, so…" Grace opens the box and finds a gold chain with a heart pendent hanging from it.

"Oh Harry!" Grace gasps, lifting it gently off its cushion and examining it. "This… isn't this the necklace Mum wore when you got married?"

"Yes. It was my Grandmother's. My Grandfather bought it for her on their wedding day. She gave it to my mother to wear when she married my father. She made me promise to offer it to my daughters when they got married."

"But I'm not…." she begins to protests.

"Yes you are," he insists and his tone tells her in no uncertain terms not to argue. "Obviously as Catherine is my first I gave it to her to keep on her wedding day but I've borrowed it back for a bit. I'll do the same when Fion marries too."

"Fion will never marry; no man will ever put up with her," Grace chuckles.

"Stop it." Harry chides gently even though he knows Grace is only joking. She loves her sister dearly but she is only seventeen and can be a little exasperating and stubborn at times.

"She's too much like you," Grace adds cheekily.

"Oi."

"Can I ask you something?"

"Of course."

"Does it bother you that I never called you Dad?" she asks apprehensively.

"What's brought this on?"

"Today I guess…you taking on the 'Father of the bride' role. You've always been like a Dad ever since you and Mum got together; you treated me like your own even when Fion came along and I was just wondering."

"I'm not saying it wouldn't have been nice," he replies honestly, "but I understand why you never did and it was never a problem for me. It didn't make me love you any less."

"Thank you," Grace replies hugging Harry dearly.

Fion finds them like that a few moments later. In a rare moment of tact she announces herself with a small cough and waits patiently while they part. When they do she announces the reason for her re-appearance. "Mum says it's time."

"Right then. We'd better get a move on; we don't want poor Wes thinking you've jilted him." Grace slides her arm through Harry's and, with Fion behind them, they make their way down to the hall. When they arrive at the door, Ruth is waiting for them with Harry's grandchildren. Catherine's daughter, Rosie, 10 and Graham's daughter Leah, 7 are acting as flower girls and Catherine's son, Thomas, 6 is being page boy. Ruth gives her daughter a quick kiss and then sneaks in to her seat.

As Rosie, Leah and Thomas make their procession down the aisle Harry feels Grace tense slightly beside him. "You okay?" he asks.

Grace nods. "It's just the thought of everyone looking at me." She never had liked to be the centre of attention; just like her mother.

"You look beautiful; everyone will think so," Fion tells her.

Grace grimaces. "I'd rather no one be looking at me at all."

"Forget about them; just focus on Wes." Harry whispers soothingly. "One step at a time, okay?" Grace at him and puts her left foot forward. There are gasps and whispers coming from both sides of the aisle as they begin. As they proceed down the aisle, Grace ignores the sea of faces that are casting admiring glances in her direction, focusing on Wes. He smiles at her as she gets closer and this gives her the confidence to cast a quick eye around the room. She sees Adam and a few members of Wes' extended family. Her family is well represented as well; both sets of her paternal grandparents, Ruth's mother, Catherine and her husband John, and Graham and his wife Rebecca. All her family is looking on proudly and Harry stands a little taller than he's ever stood; that's his little girl.

When they reach the end Grace hands her bouquet to Fion and takes Wes' hand as he whispers, "You look amazing!"

The registrar smiles and welcomes the guests before asking, "Who gives this woman to be married to this man?"

Harry steps forward, "Her mother and I do," he answers. He gives her a quick kiss and takes his seat next to Ruth. He takes her hand and squeezes it.

It isn't a long ceremony and Grace and Wes had decided to stick to the traditional vows. They exchange rings and the time finally comes for the groom to kiss the bride. He kisses her gently and there isn't a dry eye in the house.

* * *

After a delicious meal it is time for the speeches and Harry stands and taps on his glass. "If I could have your attention please." He takes the little cards he's written his speech on out of his pocket and unfolds it. Ruth bites her lip; Harry has never had any problems with speaking to large gatherings but this is different. This speech has been through numerous rewrites and has led to several sleepless nights.

"First of all, I'd like to thank you all for coming, and for helping to make this a day that Grace and Wes, and indeed the rest of the family, won't forget. It's good to see so many familiar, and a few not so familiar, faces." Another smile as Harry deftly changes cards. It's time to get serious.

"When Wes came and asked for Grace's hand in marriage, I was unprepared for it. As most of you know, I met Grace when she was six, when I began a relationship with her mother. She was a delightful child and I very quickly came to think of her as my own daughter. So when Wes came to see me and asked for her hand it was a bit of a shock to realise that I was going to lose her to another man." He pauses and changes cards again. "I was impressed that he'd come to me at all; I know I'm not the most approachable person." There are a few murmurs of agreement from the table of ex-spooks who had worked with Harry and Ruth and watched Grace grow up. "But by doing that alone he earned my respect. Now I've known Wesley since he was a child but, as I'm sure Wes will tell you, it didn't stop me from giving him a bit of a grilling; much to Ruth's horror when she found out. But Wes answered all the questions I threw at him. Above all, he answered them sincerely and honestly, and demonstrated that he was the right man for Grace. He showed me that he'd thought long and hard about the step he was about to take, and he wasn't undertaking it lightly." Another pause. "I also pointed out that by marrying Grace he was taking on the rest of our family – we come as a package and even that didn't deter him!" Polite laughter ran around the room.

Harry then turned to address Wes directly. "Wes, I know you will take good care of Grace and you will love her as much as she deserves to be loved. On behalf of Ruth, Catherine, Graham and Fion, may I say that we are very proud and honoured to welcome you to our family." Wes is highly embarrassed as everyone looks at him. Grace squeezes his hand under the table and kisses his cheek. Harry looks down to see Ruth's eyes shining with pride. He waits for the chattering to die down before speaking again.

"There are two people who are not able to share this day with Grace; her Fathers, Mark and Kevin, who passed away when Grace was 6 and it is with sadness that we remember them today. But I am sure that they would approve of Grace's choice of husband and I know that they would be immensely proud of the young woman she has grown in to. And that is, without a doubt, down to the incredible woman who raised her. So I would also like to take this opportunity, and I know Grace will join me in this, to thank her for the amazing job she has done." He turns to look at Ruth, who is blushing profusely, and there was such love in his eyes. His voice is soft as he continues, "Thank you for giving me the opportunity to be part of Grace's life."

He re-addresses the guests, "Don't worry, I'm almost finished. I'm sure you've had enough of me droning on." He lifts his glass and clears his throat. "I'd like to propose a toast to my beautiful daughter and her new husband. Please join me and raise your glasses to Grace and Wes." Everyone stands en-masse to drink the toast and Grace mouths a thank you to Harry for his words.

* * *

Harry approaches Ruth, who is stood on the edge of the dance floor. He hands her a glass of champagne and puts his arm around her shoulder. Together they watch Grace and Wes take to the floor for their first dance. They hold one another tightly, staring into each other's eyes as they move to the music. To them, they are alone; no one else exists.

"She's all grown up now," Ruth whispers, a mixture of pride and sadness in her voice. "It feels like I'm losing my little girl."

"You'll never lose her Ruth."

"They will be happy won't they?" she asks, placing her champagne down on the table next to her.

"I think they'll be as happy as we were."

Ruth raises an eyebrow. "Were?"

"Are," he corrects hastily. "Are."

The music changes and others are invited to dance. Harry takes Ruth's hand and leads her to the dance floor. Neither speaks as he holds her close, swaying gently. He closes his eyes and thinks about their life together over the last twenty years. Had it really been that long? The time seemed to have flown by.

"I love you Ruth."

"I love you too Harry."

Ruth spots Fion dancing with her boyfriend, Todd at the other end of the dance floor and smiles at the sight. He is her first proper boyfriend and they hadn't been together very long when she asked if she could bring him to the wedding. Grace had been unsure and Harry had sided with her, although Ruth suspects that was more to do with him not wanting Fion to date rather than anything to do with the wedding. But after much discussion, and weeks of pestering by Fion, Grace had given in and agreed that if she and Todd were still together when the day of the wedding arrived he could attend the evening reception. Ruth likes Todd, and she suspects that secretly Harry does too. She continues to observe them, as Todd leans in and whispers something in Fion's ear causing her to giggle softly. They seem happy enough and Ruth thinks he's good for her; he grounds her. She knows that statistically the chances of them being together for life are minimal but as long as her daughter is happy that's all that matters.

Noticing Ruth's attention has been grabbed by something else, Harry follows her gaze. He growls lightly. "His hands had better not get any lower."

Ruth glances down; Todd's hands are resting on Fion's lower back. 'Oh Harry!' she thinks and cant' resist teasing him. "You know, Harry, Fion's really fallen in love with this whole wedding thing. I wouldn't be surprised if…."

"Don't even joke about it Ruth!" he grimaces, causing Ruth to laugh. Harry doesn't see the funny side; he hopes his youngest daughter's wedding will be a long time coming.

* * *

**A/N:** Please leave one final review if you have the time.


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